My interview

Today was my individual interview...and for some reason I was nervous.  A friend who's been praying through most of this journey with me said...

"Melissa really, after all God has carried you in this journey do you really think He will drop you now?"

I truly thank God for friends like her.  Taking my mind off of my childhood that I was about to have to talk about and the dysfunction of my relationship with my sister now.  She brought it back to real for me.  And real is God has had His hand in this entire journey...softly molding mine and Joey's heart to where they need to be to accept this huge step in changing our family.  Would a God like that drop me on my face at the point I have to open up about something so hurtful?  No.  He knows my heart, He knows the times I have tried over and over to repair something I don't even know why it's broken.  But just knowing she was going to ask these questions....

And she did.
And I answered all of them as honestly as I could.
And it was fine.
And I have peace.

Most of the questions was about my childhood, about my parents, about their personalities and child rearing ways.

And about how I am alike or different in what Joey and I do.
Things I like about Joey's family that was different from mine growing up.

Then about every serious "relationship" I've ever had....that part kind of sucked to say outloud and it didn't sound pretty coming out, but I was truthful and it ended with now...and Joey and it ends beautiful.  So, it was ok.

I obviously passed, she set us up for the fire inspection and home inspection.  WHEEEWWW.

One more step behind us.  One more reason to praise God.  One more way to see why I am who I am and why I have turned out the way I have....the steps I've taken in life that have made me who I am and how that makes me see HOW MUCH MORE I AM WITH JESUS CHRIST AS MY LORD AND SAVIOR...

because I needed one.

In some weird way, telling her the things I did through laughter and not tears was affirmation to me, affirmation that He lives in me.  That He has healed me from things I once hung my head over.  He has redeemed my life and given me a chance to reach out and help others because of some of the things I have walked through.

Not that I think I can heal anybody....but I can relate to them.
Sometimes knowing the person you are talking, living with, friends with aren't perfect, haven't had a perfect little life and that are willing to share some of those struggles or "worldly wisdom" you learned from mistakes, makes opening up to them a little easier.

and I can point them to the true Healer.

I am getting excited....SOOOO excited.  Each baby-step takes us one step closer to opening our heart to a new family member, no matter how long or short that time with us will be.

Thank you Lord for softened hearts, healed hearts and the desire to help hearts.  Thank you for Your dreams and for not dropping me.  I knew You wouldn't, but it sure was nice having a friend a sister-in-Christ you have placed in lieu of my biological one in my life.  Thank You for your hand and your guidance and your promises that show me daily You are real and You are here, walking this road with me.